Replacing Cancer with Cancer as a Cure

Picture of Deputy Secretary Eric D. Hargan

According to the National Cancer Institute (NCI) a branch of the National Institutes of Health (NIH) almost 20% of new cancer patients were previously diagnosed with the same or a different cancer. The study covered years 2009 thru 2013, according to an NCI spokesman this large percentage of reoccurrence has significant ramifications and must be further investigated, no shit. Researchers explain certain types of cancers are a result of chemotherapy or radiation treatment but those types of treatment don’t explain the high recurrence rates exposed by the research.

Despite the researched data, the fact is cancer patient’s life expectancy has greatly increased over the last few decades. But if improvements are to continue the recurrence rate must be studied & remedied before the trend is reversed. So, to get more cancer survivors involved in more test trials researchers are pushing to allow previous excluded groups to participate in cancer trials even though participation is likely to be detrimental to those participants health even if the previous cancer is inactive.

U.S. Department of Health & Human Services (HHS) Secretary Eric Hargan who oversees NCI & NIH in an alleged internal meeting told his staff if more prior cancer patients are allowed to participate in trials we’ll get more kickbacks from Drug companies because trials need drugs and lots of them. A newbe to the group asked, aren’t inclusion into these trials for patients with dormant cancer likely to energize existing cancer or make old cancers comeback with a vengeance? Eric laughed, so did the group, saying newbies you’ve got to love them.

The newbie chimed in I don’t understand, when the group said listen carefully, more trials means more drugs, more drugs mean more kickbacks, that’s how we stay funded & send our kids to college, got it? The newbie said understood, but I came here to help people, everyone fell out of their chairs laughing saying good one, now go out and call some cancer survivors, we need more participants for the new designer drugs coming from one of our major donors. Eric, chimed in look if the dopes get cancer they should of known what they were signing up for, adding I can’t be the guardian of dummies.

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Worker Cancer Protections Slated for Scrapping

Picture of cartoon miner

Beryllium is a toxic metal stronger than that of steel. Its uses are varied, it can be found in the aerospace, manufacturing, medical, defense and other industries. The metal is grey in form and a little heavier than paper or foil. It’s heavily mined in the U.S. and purchased abroad. Because of its properties and ability to be mixed with other alloys it has grown to be a highly sought after material. It comes in three primary forms as a natural metal, as an alloy and oxide.

According to the Department of Labor (DOL) which is one of the Executive Offices of the President, tens of thousands of workers are exposed to the hazards of Beryllium poisoning each year. In addition, families of exposed workers are susceptible to cross contamination as well. For decades the DOL has sought to reduce workers exposure to contamination which can occur by inhaling or by physical contact. Exposure reduction efforts have been in the form of legislation and guidelines suggesting and requiring maximum exposure limits not be exceeded within certain specified time periods.

When exposure occurs fatal diseases including lung cancer are possible. In January 2017 the DOL was to make a final decision on protections required to safeguard workers. The initial decision was to toughen standards further protecting workers because of a new understanding of the toxicity and likely contamination inherit in Beryllium usage. However, the new suggested standards were postponed again (May 2017) by request. A new ruling is due to occur late August, in the interim the administration’s recommending no rule changes.

The suggestion is to leave current limits in place because if workers are still alive protections aren’t needed. The sentiment is that no one should complain until dead. According to the administration workers shouldn’t complain until death occurs. When dead the administration will allow lawsuits to proceed if brought on by the dead worker only. So, when zombie workers become a reality they’ll look into changing the exposure limits to safeguard employees from toxic exposure, until then workers should be happy to be employed.  

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Frankenstein Apples are ready for Consumption

Picture of Goofy Apple

Deregulated Enzymatic Browning Resistance Arctic Apple that glows in your stomach not in your hands will be called the Arctic Fuji apple or you can refer to it as the NF872 when it hits store shelf’s. The “Apple Event” will convert the current Arctic Golden Apple also known as the GD743 and the GS784 to this new Arctic Apple that kills insects, burns storage bags, sinks ocean transport ships and downs cargo aircraft but most of all is known to be safe for human consumption, right?

Let’s say this together but don’t hold your breath, this apple is made of Agrobacterium-mediated transformation of the cultivar with a binary vector. These ingredients sure sounds scrumptious doesn’t it? Oh yeah, I almost forgot the apple contains a binary vector containing a chimeric PPO suppression transgene made of four members of the actual Frankenstein monster. This delightful ingredients list is making me hungry. I need to know where can I pick up a bag of these Frankenstein apples?

One more thing, you’ll be happy to know Agronomic evaluations show no differences in morphology for these apples. Stop it, I can’t take it, I need to eat one now. In Great Britain American food is often referred to as Franken Food, I wonder why? By the way Franken food or Genetically Modified food has been known to cause cancer. More can be found at and at